17 minutes.
RAW is a two hour program and, last night, there was only 17 minutes of actual wrestling match action. That encompasses a grand total of 5 contests. Disgraceful.
I’m just thankful I DVR’ed the show and was able to utilize the FF button. I can’t help but feel extreme sympathy for anyone who actually attended this monstrosity. There was more useless talking done last night than in a handful of presidential debates. The J.R Farewell speech segment took 22 minutes alone.
Note to Vince McMahon: Meaningless blather is NOT the way to appeal to new viewers. All it does is punish those who have been loyal to your company.
Other thoughts from last night’s show:
- Cody Rhodes’ heel turn has to be one of the least interesting transformations in the history of the business. If he even possessed 1/80th of his father’s charisma, he may have held my attention. Also, the fact that the bookers decided to showcase the new duo of Rhodes and Lil’ Dibiase in a squash match proves they don’t have much confidence in them to carry the Tag Team Championship ball.
- While I’ve already lambasted the excessive talking, I will admit I did laugh when Edge screamed at J.R “Put that in your blog, Barbeque Boy!” Inspired stuff from the “Rated R Superstar”
- I also got a kick out Santino Marella’s new porn star ’stache. His “shut-upa you face” prompted an unplanned giggle from Rey Mysterio.
- After I watched the Y2J-Kofi Kingston match, I heard the Rock in my head: “Finally….wrestling has come back…to RAW”. These two had a well-executed match and I cant wait to see more from the innovative, ultra-athletic Kingston in weeks to come.
- Shane McMahon was so uncharacteristically under-stated in his announcement about his father’s health, I very nearly believed it…if it wasn’t so damn obvious that his “accident” was the escape route for the failed “Million Dollar Mania” program.
- The sign in the crowd said it all: “RAW is JR”. Michael Cole is a poor, poor substitute in my opinion.
- Memo to Jamie Noble: 2002 called and wants it’s tired, unfunny “Redneck Schtick” back.
- Finally, while there weren’t a lot of nice things to be said about last night’s endeavor, I am really happy to see CM Punk finally get the push he deserves. I even enjoyed watching JBL in that match. The WWE finally recognized the stale elements of their roster and invigorated them with new challenges. I hold out hope for the future.