U.S.A. - Union of Stupid Americans
November 18, 2008 by Dave C
Filed under Major League Baseball, NFL Football
I would like to take this opportunity to officially declare myself the World Champion of Internet blogging. I do this with absolutely no doubt in my mind that I am the unquestioned greatest blogger in the entire world. There is nobody better than me. Heck, you may as well call me the blogging God. Or for that matter, why don’t you just call me God?
And now I’ll explain my innaneness. I was taken aback when I read the opinions of several American columnists following Jimmie Johnson’s third consecutive Nascar drivers’ title. Johnson was crowned by these “experts” as the greatest driver in the world. Headlines included “Johnson - Best Driver Ever” and “World’s Top Driver - Jimmie Johnson.”
I’m not sure when it was decided that the “world” consisted of the United States and only the United States, but these columns and the fact that they were even published once again displays the ignorance of the American sports fan.
For starters, any true racing expert knows full well that the world’s best racing circuit is Formula One. The best drivers compete in F1 and the most money is invested WORLDwide in F1. Too bad the losers in Nascar are either rednecks from the Confederate States or F1 rejects like Juan Montoya. The bottom line is: you can’t crown someone as the world’s best driver when he’s not competing in the world’s best circuit!!
Furthermore, the actual Nascar sport is a primitive, cheap form of racing. It involves driving piece-of-crap Fords in ovals 500 times. There is nothing impressive about making a left turn. To qualify as a real world class driver, try completing a hairpin at 250 miles-per-hour.
So maybe Jimmie’s the best left turner on the planet - but World’s Best Driver? Good one!!
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The funny thing is, the Johnson coronation is just one of many examples of American ignorance. The champion of the NFL is called WORLD CHAMPION. While it may be true that there is no team outside of the NFL that could defeat the “World Champion” in a game of American football, you can’t call yourself a world champion in a non-global game, especially when all of your teams are located in the United States!
In baseball, the champion of MLB wins the WORLD SERIES! Newsflash: this league is completely confined to the United States plus Toronto and unlike American football, baseball’s a global game. Not according to Americans, however, who have defined the world as their small, little nucleus.
It goes so far beyond sports. Recently, as we all know, the American people elected Barack Obama as their president-elect. Obama is the first black man to hold the position. If you watched CNN, you heard Wolf Blitzer repeat himself ad nauseum about how this election is historic and a huge step for the African American people. In reality, all this proves is that the ”land of the free” is a big, racist country because only in the U.S. would people be judged so severely because of the color of their skin.
So to the American people: there is a whole other world south of Florida, north of Michigan, West of Hawaii and east of Maine. Why don’t you take the time to discover it? It might do you some good!!
NB: I apologize if I offended anyone in this rant. Well no I’m not really.
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November 18th, 2008 at 12:14 pm
Generalize much? I understand it was a rant (and in my last blog I basically did the same) but to say all NASCAR fans are rednecks or that all American Sports fans get riled up over the “World Champion” label, well thats a bit extreme.
I have no idea what your nationality is (we seem to have a nice mix of Americans and Canadians here) so don’t take this as a “comeback” but to say all NASCAR fans are rednecks would be like me saying only eskimos like hockey.
November 18th, 2008 at 4:19 pm
I 100% am with Joe
November 18th, 2008 at 7:17 pm
Hey bud, give it a rest with the hate-blogging, nobody really cares about your political views towards the States. Ask any black person if they think Obama being elected is a big deal and you’ll realize why Wolf put such emphasis on the historical moment. You are the World Champion of something alright.
November 18th, 2008 at 7:25 pm
I wouldn’t put so much hate into it, but I agree with your about Nascar vs. F1
generalizing about nationalities never got anyone anywhere
November 19th, 2008 at 3:27 am
I guess that you struck a chord with some people Dave!
First off let me say, I am Canadian! Second, I am also a big Nascar fan. Third, I once was an anti Nascar guy, and to a degree, an anti-American.
I started watching Nascar when the NHL season was in lockout, and before I got into it, I thought the same as you. I soon began to realize that the sport (yes, sport), is much more then drive fast and turn left. I grew to love it, and became a big fan.
I began to go to Brooklyn Michigan three years ago, to watch the Michigan Nascar race, and I thought that I would meet all of the worlds weardest people. To my suprise, about half of the people there were Canadian, and the other half, were just the same as the rest of us.
I partied (and by the way, the partying is the best) with a bunch of guys from Michigan, from Ohio, from Wisconsin, and others throughout the US. I found out, that although some of them had no idea what was going on outside of the US, some of them knew more then I did (and I concider myself well informed). I met some of the nicest people in the “world”, and made some outstanding friends, and I cannot judge a person, or a people for what they do not know, based on what they are not taught.
You may call the people of the US ignorant of what is going on outside of the US, but to bash Nascar without really knowing what it is about, is very much the same. My advice to you about Nascar, is to simply start watching it, and learning it, and maybe you will have a difference of opinion.
On the USA, I must say that you cannot discredit a country of truly proud people, that have the confidence to believe that they are the best. And whether they are, or not, is not the point, the point is, they stand together because they believe in one another. To name a person, or team as “world” champion, is not a discredit to the rest of the world, it is simply a credit to that person, or team, and at the most a damn good marketing ploy.
I cannot tell a person not to speek their mind, and I respect your opinion, but for your own good, try to get to know the people of the county of the United States, and you will soon learn that they are a lot more likable then you may think, and for a large part, a lot sparter.
November 19th, 2008 at 3:27 am
smarter
November 19th, 2008 at 6:13 am
I agree with Joe on this. Dave I normally have enjoyed many of your blogs but you went beyond striking a nerve with me on this one. As an American I an offened with how you think of many if not all of us.
I’d say your on the other end of the worlds greats blogger at this point.
November 19th, 2008 at 6:37 am
Hey Dave,
I’ve read back through some of your older blogs, and I see that you mentioned you like to take an extreme view point to try and jolt the reader’s POV, which can be a useful tactic. So after reading that I wondered if you really don’t mean everything you said in this blog, but if you really do stand by what you say, feel free to email me or leave a comment in one of my blogs and I’d love to debate the average American’s view points with you.
I got the impression that you are from the Montreal region (Habs fan right?) so if you want to know where an American in the age range of 24-38 whose a liberal democrat stands, shoot me an email
November 19th, 2008 at 7:26 am
Well Joe let me defend us Canadians with Lee.
I go to the states all the time to check out sporting events. Hockey, football, baseball, basketball and every single time I have been blown away by how nice I have been treated. I go cheer for the Bills once a year but the one time I went to watch my Broncos with all my Broncos gear on the Bills fan gave it to me pretty good until I said I always cheer for you guys but I can’t do it this year…which led to some free food from the Bills booster club. New York is one of my favorite places on earth. After always hearing how ignorant and rude people are in New York I was blown away by how nice the folks are there. We love you guys! keep up the good work
I also had the pleasure of watching team Canada beat the USA in the World Cup in Montreal and had some good laughs with the guys from the states sitting around me.
You can try and bash the passion Americans have in sports but to be honest it is hard to match. I think we only do it for hockey. Going down to the states to watch a football game or a baseball game is mind blowing. Heading over to Yankee Stadium or Wrigley field is the only way to watch a ball game. Those folks LOVE the game and that makes it so special.
As for the NASCAR thing. It isn’t for everyone. I have tried a few times to sit and watch it so I could give it an honest shot, but I really can’t get into it. However I don’t write blogs bashing it. I have many friends who I never thought would be NASCAR fans who just love it.
November 19th, 2008 at 8:24 am
Good points Sandy. I myself lived in Canada for a 4 year period (I don’t have citizenship) and it was a great experience. Canadians are as friendly as advertised and I still keep in close touch with the people I met up there.
I did sense there was some resentment towards the US by some Canadian citizens, but then again I was in high school at that time so perhaps I was getting the one-sided view of some of my classmates. But its true at times the US can be overbearing with its flag waving and some Americans do carry the “we can do no wrong” attitude which can be annoying and offensive, so if there are Canadians who take offense to that, well I can certainly understand where they are coming from. I also noticed Canadians are very proud of their country and aren’t afraid to show it. As you said American’s are a prideful bunch as well, but we are very divided, from Republicans to Democrats, liberals to conservatives, white to black to hispanic, etc. IMO Canadians seemed to be more united on most social issues, despite the abudant amount of political parties you have, lol. (Canadian politics have always interested me)
Back to sports….NASCAR is an acquired taste. I’m indifferent to it, its not really my thing, but I have nothing against it. I’ll even watch the Daytona 500 if I get a chance, I always find that to be exciting. I’d love to go to a race someday as I hear its a great experience.
November 19th, 2008 at 12:44 pm
in the words of Chase Utley “World Champions….World F’n Champions”…..
How wonderful was that. That very moment made me want to go out and buy the Chase Utley jersey I have always wanted. However do to the fact that I would never want to be confused as a band wagon jumper I can no longer purchase Phillies gear for at least a few years…
and on the other side I am sure Dave will never say Chase Utley again lol.
November 19th, 2008 at 4:01 pm
I’d like to think that Dave, especially considering his absence from this forum, was simply trying to play Devil’s Advocate here. However, if he wasn’t, I have to say I’m disappointed to hear these remarks.
First of all, I find it interesting that you would target an entire population, without even having a clue as to how many people living here feel about the state of things in one breath, while in another indict us for being a nation of racists. I have to say Dave, that sounds a bit like the pot calling the kettle black.
Secondly, for as much disdain as I too feel for NASCAR, or any driving circuit for that matter, I am embarrassed for you to use the term redneck to describe our “confederate” states. That to me illustrates that you too are showing some degree of ignorance (which I don’t feel you possess). And again, that is a bit contradictory to your overall point.
Again, I truly believe that because you tend to think outside the box, this is not in any way a representation of your true feelings (despite the fact that there are obviously some negative vibes towards Americans), and that it was done more for the prosperity of this web-site. I hope that is the case.
Either way, you certainly have elicited some good responses.
November 19th, 2008 at 5:02 pm
To move on to the lighter side of this debate, I would just like to say one more thing.
For every one of you who are not Nascar fans, (as I once was), I invite you to come with me to Michigan next August to watch a race. Or to go to another race throughout the year.
The reason why I say this, is because for the most part, Nascar is not a sport, or an event, it is a lifestyle. It is about spending the weekend camping with thousands of other warm blooded, down to earth people, who come together to party and cheer for the same purpose. It is like talegateing at a Buffalo Bills game X 1000, and spread out over four days. I KID YOU NOT!
And it is not just “rednecks” or hicks, it is a wide variety of interesting people.
For an example, Scotty! My friend from Ohio, who happens to be Black, and loves Nascar as much as the best of us. Go Kasey Kahne! Then there is Billy, who resembles the type of guy that you would associate with Nascar, but would floor you under the table with his intellect and political knowledge (both American, Canadian, and more). This is just to name a few.
So, for those of you who would take me up on this offer, i can almost guarentee you that you would at least gain a large respect for the sport, and the people who love it.
P.S. Canadian football is nowhere near as good as American football, so if for nothing else, I love America for that!!!
November 20th, 2008 at 8:33 am
This guy must have gone to the Jason Whitlock school of writing. Get everyone pissed off so you’ll read his article. Either that or he’s on some good perscription medication. As you can see it worked on me.
November 20th, 2008 at 1:10 pm
It’s funny how Dave C knows the difference between Formula and a Nascar racing, like he’s done it all before.